Taking a Break from Facebook ~ Here’s How to Do It

When you want to take a break from Facebook, you have options. You can decide to not go on Facebook for awhile, or you can deactivate your account.

Whether you are thinking of giving up Facebook for a few days or weeks or you are thinking of quitting Facebook altogether, consider your choices.

Taking a break from Facebook

Before doing anything, here are the options to take a break from Facebook. You can:

  1. Give Facebook up for a few days, weeks or longer by simply not logging on.
    • For mental health
    • To save time
    • To see if you can
  2. Deactivate your Facebook account.
    • Temporarily disable
    • Permanently delete

These are ways to taking a break from being on Facebook. You also have the option to:

  • Take a break from someone on Facebook.

This is different. In this instance, you don’t give up Facebook. Instead, you alter the settings so you don’t see annoying people. This isn’t the same as taking a break from Facebook. It’s taking a break from one of your Facebook friends without them knowing.

You can take a break from a Facebook friend by Unfollowing them or Snoozing them.

The great thing is, you get to decide what works for you. Everyone has different reasons for wanting a break from Facebook and social media.

Social media and mental health

Sometimes we need a break from seeing everything people post on Facebook. Social media affects our mental health. Facebook can cause anxiety. Facebook can make us depressed.

Instead of making us happy, sometimes Facebook makes us feel bad.

For all the great things social media does to bring us together, it often brings us down.

break from social media

Giving up Facebook for a few days, weeks or months

You may want to give up Facebook for awhile but not forever. Perhaps you want to take a mental break from it because of what people post.

You may want to save time because you spend too much time on Facebook.

Another reason for giving up Facebook is to see if you can.

Wanting to take a mental break

Giving up Facebook can give you perspective and a mental break.

It’s normal to sometimes be annoyed seeing what your Facebook friends are posting. This is especially true if they are bragging or posting about their seemingly perfect lives.

Sometimes when we log on, we get upset when we see things we weren’t invited to. It can also be upsetting to see political posts.

Taking a break from Facebook to get some distance from all of this can help.

take a break from facebook

Wanting to save time

In addition, we may find ourselves spending a lot of time on Facebook. We may get more done if we weren’t constantly checking Facebook for Notifications and to see who Liked our posts.

It takes a lot of time to scroll through our feed, catching up on everyone’s posts.

Giving up Facebook to see if you can

Sometimes we feel addicted to Facebook and want to see if you can give it up. Some people give up Facebook for Lent.

How to take a break from Facebook for a little while

In these instances, there’s nothing you need to do. Just don’t go on Facebook. You won’t post to your wall or check your newsfeed. You simply don’t log on Facebook.

Here are Easy Ways to Break the Facebook Habit

You keep all of your Facebook friends and everything just as it was.

Taking a break from Facebook is hard to do at first, but it gets easier the longer you do it.

Once you break the cycle of checking Facebook, you will find you have time for other things.

I gave up Facebook and found it was easy to do. Sure, it was tough in the beginning but after a few days of giving up Facebook, I forgot about logging on entirely.

It’s so true: The longer you go without it, the easier it is to stay off. Many people succeed at taking a break from Facebook and social media for weeks or longer.

Deactivating your Facebook account

If you want to take it to the next level, you can temporarily deactivate your Facebook account. In addition, you can permanently delete Facebook account.

Temporarily deactivate your Facebook account

If you decide to do more than just stay off Facebook for awhile, you have the option to temporarily disable your account.

To do this, you simply:

  • Click on the top right of the page.
  • Click on Settings.
  • Go to Manage My Account.
  • Click Deactivate My Account.

You can come back whenever you want.

Taking a break from Facebook
Taking a break from Facebook

In the meantime, your name and comments, etc. may still be visible but people won’t be able to go to or see your Facebook profile.

Permanently delete Facebook account

If you want to take more drastic measures to quit Facebook, you can permanently delete Facebook account. You won’t be able to reactivate it.

This means, should you decide to return to Facebook, you will have to start again. You will need to send new Facebook friend requests. You won’t have your pictures, anything on your wall, or any information.

Taking this step is the extreme if you want to take a break from Facebook. Before permanently deactivating your account, you may want to try staying off Facebook. If that doesn’t work for you, then you can temporarily disable your Facebook account.

By permanently deactivating your Facebook account, you are taking more than a break from Facebook. You will need to start over if you ever wish to return.

Consider conditions before taking a break from Facebook

We love Facebook. It’s a part of our lives and our routines. For sure, Facebook has become a habit.

Trying to take a break from it, even a for a little while, can be a challenge. If something major is going on in your life, you might find it calming to keep to your Facebook routine.

Maybe you are seeking online support or attention from your community of digital friends. Or perhaps something important or serious is going on in one of your Facebook friends’ lives.

Checking in with social media is a way to keep abreast of what’s happening without needing to make direct contact. It’s also a great way to curb FOMO, the Fear of Missing Out. Social media keeps us in the loop.

A great time for me to give up Facebook is during our kids’ summer breaks and other school breaks. Others find it convenient when they are taking vacations from their jobs.

It’s much easier to try to give up Facebook for a few days when you aren’t in the throes of having to see people each day, having small talk.

It works the best when you don’t have to be in the (social) know about anything, and won’t feel like you are missing out.

Try it. It’s a good mental break to get off social media. There aren’t too many times to truly feel like you can get away from it all… and giving up Facebook can be a great start.

What does Facebreak mean

I actually thought there was a word for giving up Facebook.

Several times in my News Feed, I’ve seen Facebook friends declare they were taking a Facebreak. Because of seeing this so often, I thought Facebreak meant they were giving up Facebook for awhile.

But they — and I –were wrong. According to the Urban Dictionary, taking a Facebreak is when you take a break from what you are doing so that you can go ON Facebook. Ha!

So, what’s the word for when you are actually trying to, or succeeding at, taking a break from Facebook?

Taking a break from Facebook

I consulted the hip Urban Dictionary once again, hoping to find a term for this. Searching there and other places online, there doesn’t seem to be a trendy word for this.

Taking a break from Facebook seems to be the phrase that you are simply “taking a break from Facebook.”

This behavior must be so uncommon and unnatural, there isn’t a word for it yet!

Turn off Facebook Notifications to quit Facebook

Some people get notifications to update them on Facebook activity.

When you have them turned off, your day-to-day decisions and life aren’t being affected by whether or not someone commented on your Facebook post.

You won’t be constantly interrupted from my real life to check into my digital life.

Turning off Facebook Notifications helps me break the spell of feeling compelled to constantly log onto Facebook.

On a Facebook break — the Facebreak?

You will find once you take a break from Facebook for a day or two, it gets much easier to keep off of it.

By the time I made it a week without going on Facebook, it was easy.

Once you give up Facebook, you don’t want to ruin your No Facebook streak by logging on. It’s actually fun to give up Facebook.

take a break from Facebook

Facebook friends announcing they are taking a break from Facebook

I’ve seen many people do it, usually with an announcement of sorts, so as not to appear rude for not Liking and Commenting on friends’ posts.

It’s polite and kind behavior. Recently, on Facebook, a close friend proclaimed he was taking a Facebreak for a week and wished everyone a Happy Facebook Birthday in advance.

Another friend went into greater detail.

She posted when she returned to Facebook, explaining her 3-week Facebook hiatus, and wished everyone she missed a Happy Birthday, Happy Anniversary, Get Well Soon, Congratulations, and Sorry for Your Loss. She wasn’t being crass or snarky.

This friend truly felt badly about missing people’s milestones and not being (virtually) there for them to share in their good and bad news.

A relative commented how he realized he’s been on Facebook for a third of his life. When he realized that, he wanted to create some distance from Facebook. It shocked many of his peers and others to discover they too have been on Facebook for over a decade of their lives.

During the height of the political posts, I had another friend declare he was signing off for good.

He was appalled at the political opinions on Facebook. He found himself thinking differently about some very good friends. While much of this would never have come up in real, reach-out-and-touch-you-life, some posted wildly on Facebook. He’d had enough.

He didn’t just put Facebook account on temporary hold. He completely deactivated it.

Other Facebook friends got off social media without explanation.

Taking a break from Facebook and social media

Remember, there are certain times in your life when it’s easier to take a break from social media than other times.

And remember, everything will still be waiting in Facebook for you to peruse at your leisure, when you do return.

Whatever your reason may be, you might find you want a break from Facebook.

You’ll probably find it very refreshing. While the siren song of Facebook looms, think of the things you can do with all of your free time! You may find you like being less connected and more present in your own life.

And when you log back on, you can see your friend requests and other things waiting for you.

Reasons for taking a break from social media

You might want to take a break from Facebook to prove to yourself that you can. Many times we feel addicted to social media.

Some people choose to quit Facebook for awhile because of the time they spend on it. Many people also want to take a break from Facebook due to the mental toll it takes.

Staying away from Facebook is a good way to reminisce what our lives were like before our 24/7 access to everyone and everything. It’s normal to want to take a break from Facebook.

Someone doesn’t accept your Friend Request on Facebook: Now what?

When someone doesn’t accept your friend request on Facebook, it’s upsetting. You put yourself out there and were ignored or denied. You have a right to be hurt, embarrassed and mad.

Someone not accepting your friend request can mean different things depending on the situation. Here’s what to consider and what to do.

Someone not accepting your friend request on Facebook

Before reacting, you need to take a few days. Things always seem worse right away. With technology, we are so used to everything happening immediately.

Just because someone doesn’t accept your friend request right away, doesn’t mean she won’t.

You may be someone who logs onto Facebook often, but you don’t know how often others do. In addition, even if the person you sent a request to did log on after you sent her a friend request, it doesn’t mean she had time to accept it.

From personal experience, there are times I log on Facebook quickly for one thing, and then log off.

Just because someone didn’t accept your friend request soon after you sent it doesn’t mean they never will. Hang tight.

How do you know if someone has declined your friend request?

To know for sure your Facebook friend request was denied, you can search the person’s name. Once you are in their profile, look at the big profile picture and go to the bottom right of that picture. It will say Add Friend or Friend Request Sent.

If it says “Add Friend,” that means the person denied your friendship request.

If it says “Friend Request Sent,” that means they haven’t done anything yet. They may or may not have seen it.

not accepting Facebook friend request

Why did someone not accept my friend request

As with someone unfriending you, most likely, you will never know the reasons for someone not accepting your friend request.

However, it’s normal to want to know the reason someone didn’t accept your friend request. You reached out to that person for a reason. Perhaps you just met them, live in the same neighborhood, have a lot of friends in common, work together, or want to get to know her better. 

For whatever reason, you put yourself out there. No one wants to be rejected. When you send a Facebook friend request to someone who doesn’t accept, it’s awkward. It’s especially awkward if you will see this person face-to-face.

Why is someone not accepting my friend request

There are reasons someone might not accept a friend request, especially right away.

The person may not have seen it.

You may not know if this is a person who logs onto Facebook daily. If she is among your mutual friends, you may have an idea of how frequently she’s on Facebook. But it’s difficult to know for sure. People are busy and have things going on we don’t know about.

The person saw it but didn’t have time to accept it.

She may have seen it but wasn’t in a position to Accept Friend so she didn’t.

The person forgot about it.

The person may have forgotten about your friend request. The good news, is they will see it again when someone else sends them a friend request.

When you send someone a friend request, they will receive a notification on the top right of their screen. It’s next to the Create button.

It tells them they have a new friend request. Once she clicks on it, it won’t be highlighted again. Therefore, if she doesn’t accept your friend request right then, she won’t be reminded again. She will have to go back to accept your friend request.

At anytime, you can go to the Friend Requests button, and click to add friend.

The only way for this person to see the friend request is to manually go in and see all the people who have asked her to be friends. The requests/people remain there until you Remove Friend Request. You do this by pushing the Delete button instead of the Accept button.

The person is taking a break from Facebook.

Another reason someone wouldn’t have accepted your friend request is if she is taking a break from Facebook. This is something people do, sometimes intentionally and sometimes not.

Someone may be busy at work or on vacation and not be checking Facebook as often. If she’s not checking Facebook notifications, she wouldn’t know she received a friend request.

You can search her name in the top bar to see if she comes up and if you can see her wall. Look to see if she posted anything recently. If she did, then she may have seen your friend request.

However, if she has her Facebook privacy settings set high, you won’t be able to see if she posted unless you are Facebook friends. You will see an icon that says Friend Request Sent. There’s nothing more you can do.

If you have mutual Facebook friends, you may see if she Liked or commented on one of your mutual friends’ posts.

What to do when someone doesn’t accept your Friend Request

You sent someone a friend request on Facebook, and they don’t accept it. That leaves you to wonder what’s going on.

Do not ask them about it. You shouldn’t mention it to anyone else either.

All you can do is hold your head high, try not to obsess about it, and above all, don’t reach out to them again via Facebook.

You certainly don’t want to embarrass yourself further.

Mutual friend doesn’t accept friend request

There’s a fellow mom in my small community who didn’t accept my Friend Request. What to do?

She is someone more entrenched in the social scene than I am. She’s someone who seems to already have her friend group and isn’t seeking new friends.

Still, how hard is it to “Accept” a Friend Request? Especially given we have 25+ Mutual Friends. And we live in a small town where everyone knows everyone.

All the times we’ve seen each other, at the very least, we gave each other a smile and a hello. Oftentimes, more than that.

It was a natural thing for me to reach out via Facebook. It was by no means a reach. (Does this sound like high school?!)

But she didn’t accept the request. It was quite maddening.

I ran into her a few times when my request was lingering out there.

It really bugged me she didn’t accept it; she’s active on Facebook. I see her tagged in many Mutual Friends’ posts.

I can’t say anything to anyone about it. My goal is to look like I don’t care.

Instead of letting that Friend Request hang out there — giving her more power if it’s a power play — after about three weeks, I removed my request.

My rational was that if she deleted it by mistake, she could easily send me a new request — but she didn’t.

So now, any time Facebook offers up “People You May Know,” and I see her face and her name pop up to “Add Friend,” I click the x on the upper right and remove her.

Whenever I see her in real life, I’m my polite, usual self. But deep down, I know to not engage further.

She knows where to find me if she wants to.

when someone doesn't accept friend request

Can you remind someone to accept your friend request

No, you can’t remind someone to accept your friend request.

And please, to keep your reputation intact, do not reach out to this person. She may be snubbing you. There’s no need to contact or remind someone to accept your friend request.

If someone doesn’t accept your request, move on.

If someone doesn’t accept your friend request, can you send them a new request

You may be wondering if someone doesn’t accept your friend request, can you send them a new request? Please don’t.

You can send them a new request if they declined your Facebook friend request. Meaning, Facebook will allow you to do this.

If it shows Friend Request Sent, you can’t send them a new request. Your request is pending. That means your friend request is still hanging out there.

Either way, if someone didn’t accept your Facebook friend request, do not resend the request. Nothing good will come from this. You will look desperate.

Don’t give them the satisfaction, and don’t embarrass yourself. If they don’t accept your request, forget it, and move on.

How do I know if someone accepted my friend request on Facebook

You will receive a Facebook notification when the person accepts your friend request. This person will also be added to your list of Facebook friends.

There have been a few times when I didn’t receive a Facebook notification when someone accepted my friend request. I saw they accepted because I saw them in my list of Facebook friends. You can also look up the person’s name, and you will see you are connected to them.

Another way to know if someone accepted your friend request is if you keep track of how many Facebook friends you have. Your number will increase by one each time someone accepts your friend request.

How do I know if someone didn’t accept my friend request on Facebook

The only way you will know if someone didn’t accept your friend request is if they hit “Delete” instead of “Confirm” when they saw your friend request.

You can log into your Friend Requests icon. If they declined your friend request, you will see it there.

If they didn’t confirm or decline your request — and your request is still out there — they didn’t accept it nor did they reject it. They’ve done nothing.

After awhile, you may assume someone who hasn’t confirmed your request is declining it, hasn’t seen it, or is still deciding whether to accept it.

Friend requests icon

To find the Friend Requests button on Facebook, log into your Facebook account. You will see the big search bar on the top. To the right of that, you will see your name, Home, Create. The next button is the Friend request icon.

This lights up when you have received a friend request. You can use it to track who has accepted or declined your requests.

Someone not accepting friend request on Facebook

Facebook is a wonderful way to stay in touch with hundreds of people; it’s is awesome in so many ways. It gives us a way to connect to practically anyone we want to.

But it also has the power to impact our emotions. So many times our highs and lows are based on how many Facebook friends we have and how many Likes and comments we get on our posts.

When someone doesn’t accept our friend request, it’s hard to deal with. It makes it worse if this is a person who has a lot of mutual friends with you. It’s also tough if you will have to see this person in real life.

What to do when someone doesn’t accept your friend request on Facebook

If you won’t ever see this person in real life, don’t worry about it. You won’t have an awkward moment and won’t have to worry about talking with them and this being the elephant in the room.

If it’s a person who is seldom on Facebook, no worries. He or she probably didn’t see it. They don’t put a high priority on Facebook. It’s likely an oversight they didn’t accept your friend request.

If it’s someone with whom you have a lot of mutual friends and will see in real life, don’t do anything or say anything to them about it. Nothing good will come from you asking them about why they didn’t accept your friend request. Try not to obsess about it.

What all of these scenarios have in common is that they Require You To Do Nothing. The bottom line when someone doesn’t accept your friend request is to do nothing. Say nothing.

How to deal with friends who don’t accept your friend request

It’s embarrassing when you have a friend who doesn’t accept your friend request. In this instance, the question is, “How good of friends are you?” If this is one of your best friends, then yes, say something. If not, say nothing.

What does it mean when someone doesn’t accept your friend request

If someone doesn’t accept your friend request, it means they don’t want to be friends with you on Facebook.

It’s hard to remember things aren’t always as they seem, so it’s easy to assume she is ignoring you. This may or may not be the case.

Not accepting your friend request

From experience, I know many people have a long list of friends they sent friend requests to and those people never responded. Years later, those friend requests are hanging out there. Chances are, those people never looked at their friend request icon through a laptop to see all the requests they have. You can only do so much through a mobile phone.

So try not to take it personally, especially if they are long-ago friends.

Friend request denied

Think about someone not accepting your friend request on Facebook. Yikes! It stings. What do you do? Our advice is to do NOTHING. Don’t ask them why they didn’t accept your request. Don’t ask them why they denied your friend request. Please don’t ask them if they saw your friend request. 

Related: Not being invited

Remember that with Facebook, there is usually something to make you happy or something to make you upset. Someone not accepting your friend request is a big Facebook problem we have to deal with.

Care Reaction on Facebook ~ At Long Last We Can Hug!

Cheers for the Care emoji. We say, it’s about time. The Care reaction on Facebook is a nice way to acknowledge someone’s situation when you don’t want to be Sad or Angry.

Now, you can show you Care with a virtual hug.

In the past, if you didn’t want to use the Sad or Angry emojis, the other options were to Like or Love something. The other choices were to Laugh or use the Wow emoji.

Oftentimes, none of these were appropriate.

During these extra-challenging times, Facebook wanted to give people a way to express support and solidarity. They released the Care button.

Care reaction on Facebook

Think about all the things your Facebook friends post. Oftentimes, it’s bad news.

People post about illnesses, job loss, moving. They use it to announce and remember deceased friends and family.

While people often show off and brag on Facebook, there’s oftentimes the real, heart-to-heart sharing of bad news.

People post on Facebook because they want to get support. They want to know their real friends on Facebook and their virtual friends on Facebook care about what’s going on in their lives.

If they didn’t care about getting support, they wouldn’t be posting their personal information.

Facebook’s statement about their Care reaction

Hug emoji

As a fellow Facebook friend, you want to be able to show your support. You want to be able to show you care, even if it’s virtually.

That was difficult to do with the emojis Facebook offered users before.

You could have expressed your concern by being Sad or Angry…. but it wasn’t appropriate to Like someone’s bad news.

It was challenging to know what to do. While you can comment that you are “Thinking of them,” if you wanted to acknowledge you saw the post and show your support, you were limited in your emoji options.

Am I supposed to Like or Love that someone’s child is sick? Should friends show their support by Liking that someone’s parent has passed?

The only option was to use the Sad button. That was usually appropriate but somehow, not enough. Many people clicked “Like” in these situations as a way to acknowledge them.

Facebook Care emoji

But now there is the Care button. It’s a virtual hug. This makes things so much easier. Just click the Care and feel good about showing your support.

It’s interesting it took Facebook so long to come up with the hugging emoji. For all they do to intuit our every move, they did take their time to come out with the Care button.

Certainly, these are challenging times. According to Facebook’s tech communications manager, Alexandru Voica, the Care emoji is now “a way for people to share their support with one another during this unprecedented time.”

The new Care button is to show a sign of caring and “we are in this together” during the recent crisis.

We hope it remains alongside the Like, Love, Funny, Wow, Sad, and Angry options. When you consider the gamut of things people post on Facebook, there is a lot to Care about. It’s a wonderful way to acknowledge friends’ posts.

Care button on Facebook
The Care button sits in nicely after the Love emoji and before the Funny emoji

What is the Care button on Facebook?

The Care button on Facebook is a face holding a heart. You can use it to express your support and concern. Basically, use it to show you care.

When you use the Care button on Facebook, you show your support and that you care. If you see something troubling on a Facebook friend’s post, you can click “Care” and extend a virtual hug to them.

When to use the Care reaction on Facebook?

Here are some examples of when you can use the Care button:

  • Expressing solidarity about something
  • Job loss
  • Illness, hospital stay
  • Someone’s passing
  • Anniversary of someone’s passing
  • Any hard times

You can use it whenever you want to express concern, sadness, help, and good thoughts.

Basically, think about the Care reaction like this. If you saw this person in real life, and they told you this news, would you be inclined to reach out and give them a hug?

If so, use the Care reaction when someone posts something like this on Facebook.

Why did Facebook come out with Care reaction?

This new reaction is really helpful to Facebook users. It literally is a virtual hug when we can’t reach out and hug someone.

Now Facebook friends have the option to express their solidarity with a difficult situation. You can use it in addition to commenting on someone’s post or just like you did with the other emojis… you can click Care, and go on to other posts in your feed.

Facebook offers you the opportunity to use the Care button on a photo or a video.

This was one expression that was missing from Facebook’s arsenal of options.

Like, Love, Care, Funny, Wow, Sad, Angry

For all that Facebook does to anticipate our every move, they were very behind on creating the Care button. However, in the end, they unleashed it at the perfect time.

We now have this more neutral option to express our support without needing to be Angry or Sad about it.

This is another reason to love Facebook.

Bewitched: Why We Love Facebook So Much

Why we love Facebook

Oh, the lure of Facebook. Just think of the friend requests when you see that icon activated. It’s like getting a present: Who wants to be my Facebook friend?

When I first joined Facebook, a former co-worker posted to my wall. She jokingly warned me what a big “time suck” Facebook was. This was back in 2008 before it even was a big time suck, compared to nowadays with ever-increasing interacting between its billions of users and trending news stories.

Facebook has exploded. And now, years later, boom! We are addicted to and love Facebook.

Facebook before it became a habit

Initially, Facebook wasn’t all-consuming and addicting. Most users probably checked into Facebook once every few days. They browsed around and enjoyed the friend requests as long-lost friends joined and started looking for their long-lost friends. I maybe spent two hours a month on Facebook, if that.

Facebook wasn’t top of mind; it wasn’t a priority. And for sure, it wasn’t a habit.

There were entire months when I didn’t log on Facebook at all. So many of my friends still weren’t on it, and if they were Facebook members, they were using it sporadically, like me.

But as the years went by, it sort of reached a tipping point for me and millions of others. And now, Facebook has become a multiple-times-a-day habit. It’s so powerful, people even describe it as Facecrack.

Why? How did we all get so addicted to Facebook? Why do we love Facebook so much?

Why we love Facebook
Why we love Facebook (Photo credit: Kate Ter Haar)

Love Facebook

Think of all the Likes you get after posting something.

Don’t you love to see all the Comments to your posts? Don’t you just love all that attention?

It’s like an online popularity-making machine.

The more you put out there, the more affirmation you will get back.

So you post and post and post. You comment and comment. And you like and you like.

And you are really hoping to get likes and comments back, aren’t you?

All of that positive affirmation is very addicting. Really, how much positive feedback do we generally get in our daily lives?

Not enough! We’re exhausted… overworked and stressed out.

We work hard each day to feed our kids, get them to school, get ourselves to work, help with homework, run kids to activities, volunteer, clean the house, go grocery shopping, and on and on. These are thankless tasks. And if we aren’t working a “job” job, we don’t get a check.

There’s really nothing tangible to show for our hard work.

We aren’t getting the accolades we crave to keep us going. Yet, we can get practically instant attention and kudos from Facebook.

As if that isn’t addicting enough, Facebook offers lots more than attaboys. There’s just so much to do in Facebookland.

We can sit in the comfort of wherever we are and can chat with anyone we want. We can vent, seek advice, show off. It’s easy to post perfect pictures and craft witty remarks.

We can create whatever image of ourselves and our families we want to. For all of us long-time-married people, it’s like dating used to be: We can be our best selves.

Facebook is like today’s video games

Like so many video games today, Facebook is infinite. Remember the video games we grew up with? We had only three lives in PAC-MAN. You would eventually be destroyed in Space Invaders. Those cars in Frogger would smash us. The games ended.

So many of the video games today go on and on. Building, crafting, mining, creating. I’m not sure what my kids are doing in some of those games but they’re completely captivated and engrossed. It’s like that with Facebook too. Sometimes we are in it and realize many (many) minutes later that we’ve somehow been lost in memories or in conversations. We were in a daze, a Facebook fog.

Facebook as an escape

Without productive things to focus on, what once became tempting now has become a habit. Many of us want to learn to break the Facebook habit and spend less time lost in cyberspace.

But for all the escapism it provides, Facebook is really quite practical as well. Thus, the conundrum.

Using Facebook as a resource

There are so many fantastic reasons to use Facebook.

It’s just so darned convenient. Type a few sentences and click Post, and hundreds of friends and family members can see what we are up to.

It’s like a monthly, weekly or daily holiday card. You don’t have to wait until December to update everyone and get everyone’s updates via USPS. Now, you can see them online, 24/7.

Facebook birthdays are awesome as well. We can reach out to all of our Facebook friends, and they can reach out to us on our big day. Who doesn’t love that? Many people use Facebook to invite people to real-life and virtual parties.

How Facebook helps us

It’s human nature to want to connect with people, and Facebook makes it super-convenient, easy, free, and fast. Of course we are lured into the siren song of Facebook! It’s great for:

Keeping in touch with family and friends

Facebook is a brilliant, time-saving resource. There just isn’t an easier, faster or better way to keep in touch with hundreds of friends and family members.

It helps you keep up with their news and show you care.

Securing new friendships

Facebook helps secure friendships with new people. It is an easy way to stay in touch with fellow moms, church members, co-workers, classmates, teammates, and neighbors.

Learn “who is who” when moving or changing jobs, schools, etc.

Whether you move to a new state or across town, and even when your kids start school, Facebook again comes to the rescue to help connect the dots with people and learn who is who.

Know what is going on with friends you see often

Do you feel like you are missing out on all the excitement if you don’t log on Facebook every day? What are all the moms talking about? What’s going on at school? What did you miss?!

Get back in touch with long-lost friends

Oh, the joy of finding a former neighbor or beloved ex-coworker. My favorite is when I come across an elementary-school playmate. For those of us who have been adults for decades, that means we can reconnect with classmates from 30+ years ago.

Simply type a name, click, and scroll. Most likely you can easily see where this person lives, if they are married and/or have kids, and what they look like. Who is the adult version of the child you once knew?

How great to become Facebook friends and reconnect. You don’t even need to send holiday cards when you can see them on Facebook.

Show off your accomplishments and your kids’ activities

Who doesn’t love to brag and boast a bit about themselves or their family?


Who doesn’t love being included on Facebook in one of these posts where lots of people are tagged?

More Facebook resources we love

Facebook is very practical and time-saving as well. Sure, we can use a massive email to include everyone in our group, team, or committee. But when you are making decisions and need feedback, setting up a Facebook group is so much better.

Using Facebook for group communication

Maybe you’re in a Facebook group right now. I’m in several: Volunteer committee at church; scouts; high school reunion; and a few others.

Once you’ve seen the power and convenience of setting up a Facebook group, you will never return to back-and-forth emails.

So often I have to break my Facebook hiatus because I feel the pressure of missing some important information that people share in my Facebook groups.

One of the best things about Facebook groups is that you can actually see who has seen the post and who hasn’t seen it. It’s a great way to ensure everyone has the information they need.

Using Facebook for group support

Are you looking for support in some way? Do you want to be (virtually) around people who understand?

You can start or join an exercise or weight loss Facebook group or one for moms with twins. There’s most likely one for most things you may want to discuss with others who share your interests.

More Facebook resources

Facebook is a brilliant resource for businesses. It’s inexpensive, timely, and easy to reach your exact demographic.

What business doesn’t long for positive viral press? Marketers work to increase Facebook traffic through Likes, Followers and Comments.

It’s a real tool, and a company without a Facebook presence is sorely missing out.

Using Facebook for business 

Even when I try so hard to stay off Facebook, it’s even more difficult because of relying on it for my business.

I can now legitimately use the excuse of needing to go onto Facebook to update my business page, comment on customers’ comments, and to post new information.

It’s inexpensive to run Facebook ads. It has become a real goal to brand-build through Likes and Followers. Nowadays, it’s practically necessary to be on Facebook if you have a business.

And so the Facebook addiction continues….

What else can Facebook help with?

More and more, people are getting their news solely from Facebook. It’s easy to learn about places to go, recipes to try, what to watch on television, what to read, and what’s happening in our world.

Of course we love Facebook… it’s our go-to online for everything we need and want.

  • Using Facebook for news It’s easy to be on Facebook and see the trending stories. The bait could list a place or a famous person. We are tempted to click to see what is happening.
  • Using Facebook for politics – Enough already! Most of us are over the political posts but there are those who continue to enjoy posting. It’s interesting to learn more about your Facebook friends’ viewpoints but you have to be careful to not engage in harmful debates or get too annoyed with people’s comments.
  • Using Facebook for discounts  In addition to the advertisements that Facebook puts in front of us, our friends often talk about a great sale or deal they got. Here you can learn about back-to-school shopping deals and more.

It’s a true test of willpower when trying to log onto Facebook with the sole purpose of checking on something or to post something. And we’re not alone in our quest to manage our Facebook time. Truly, we are addicted to Facebook.

Bewitched by Facebook

We can rest assured we are not alone. It is mind-boggling to comprehend but Facebook now has over one billion active users. It is easy to become lured, spellbound and bewitched by Facebook. It’s a real-time, virtual yearbook about practically anyone you’ve ever met!

Add in the convenience of keeping up with family and friends, using Facebook for groups and for business, how can it not be addicting? It’s difficult not to love Facebook.

Why we love Facebook

These are interesting times now that Facebook has become a habit.

Everyone is able to create whatever image they want of themselves 24/7. It’s permeated our society so much that we may feel closer to our (virtual) Facebook friends than to our (real-life) friends we see much more often.

Whether you love Facebook or not, you have to admit, it’s convenient. You can easily blast out your latest and greatest while keeping in contact with almost every person you’ve ever known.

Perhaps you’re bored… log onto Facebook! Maybe you’re wanting a little attention… post something on Facebook. Even better, write a cliffhanger post so everyone will wonder what’s going on.
What makes you rush to post on Facebook sometimes but not other times? Do you play social mind games with your Likes and Comments? Name one Facebook user who hasn’t done some cyber-sleuthing on Facebook as well.
Facebook is so entwined with our lives. We pop on first thing in the morning, while waiting in the car pickup line, and in the midst of making dinner.
It’s like our own commercial break from life:
We interrupt our regularly scheduled programming to see what else is better out there to distract us for a bit.
We use it so much, some of us are trying to figure out a way to stop going on Facebook so much.
We’ve adapted to this virtual world so easily. Log onto Facebook, and it’s as if you are suddenly lost in another dimension. You get to go to this virtual party, and everywhere you look, all your friends are there. Also great? Everywhere each of your friends look, they see only their (Facebook) friends too.
There are zillions of reasons why we love Facebook so darn much.

Can’t We Be United? Facebook and Politics Don’t Mix

Facebook and politics

Facebook and politics don’t mix. If you’ve been on Facebook lately or anytime really, you will have seen it. Political posts on Facebook are rampant.

Long gone are the days where we looked forward to logging onto Facebook. Remember the early days when we were so happy to connect with long-ago friends?

We would relish in the ability to keep up with dozens — and then hundreds — of friends near and far.

But now? Many of those same Facebook friends — along with people you see everyday in real life — use Facebook differently.

Now, everyone says whatever they want on Facebook, with zero regard whether they are being politically correct or not.

They say what they mean, and they don’t care what anyone thinks.

It’s often annoying. I don’t want to know all of this about these people. We had a lighthearted Facebook friendship but now it’s gotten too serious and heated.

Sometimes these posts are filled with hatred.

Sure, most of us have strong opinions about local and world events. But that doesn’t mean they belong on Facebook.

Can you filter out political posts on Facebook?

It would be wonderful if Facebook had a feature to block political posts. Sadly, they don’t.

However, something that helps is the Unfollow button.

We all have Facebook friends who make political posts. You know who they are. We all usually have at least one or two friends who are outspoken on Facebook.

If their political posts annoy you, you can Unfollow them. What’s great about this feature is:

  • They won’t know you unfollowed them
  • You are still Facebook friends with them

When you Unfollow someone, it means you won’t see anything they post pop into your newsfeed. They beauty of this is you can still go to their wall and see what they post and interact if you choose.

They won’t know that you aren’t seeing their political posts and other posts.

Again, should you wish to engage with this Facebook friend, you can easily go to their page and Like or Comment on any of their posts.

What this does is lets you control if you see their posts or not.

When it comes to friends posting their political views and opinions on Facebook, this is a wonderful option.

Do you respond to friends’ political posts?

We all know how annoying it is to see politics on Facebook. But what do you do when your Facebook friends are writing about issues you disagree with?

First, take a breath. It’s sometimes shocking to learn that someone who thought you knew and had a lot in common with shares views so differently from your own.

You may have been able to tolerate it better if you heard it in person in the context of a conversation or discussion. Yet sometimes, when we are least expecting it… Bam! You see a friend make a controversial post on Facebook. You’re stunned.

They put their opinions out there, and you better stay out of the way if you don’t agree with them.

So take this advice, if you don’t agree, don’t acknowledge the post. Move along.

By making a comment and including your differing opinion, it really won’t change theirs. It will likely add fuel to the fire and nothing more.

Facebook and political posts

In the aftermath of the presidential election and especially after Inauguration Day, everyone’s Facebook Newsfeeds exploded with political commentary.

With so many Faceboook friends posting political opinions, I wanted to scream, “Why are you posting that?”

And if they are really truly thinking these things, “Why are you posting them on Facebook?!”

It’s happening now too in our current political climate. Whether or not I agree with their posts is irrelevant. Political posts don’t belong on Facebook.

Pretty please with cherry on top: Stop posting political opinions on Facebook.

Facebook and politics

Remember years ago when we were all new to Facebook? We might have encouraged spirited debate but we didn’t go all out to hate and argue and accuse and defame.

Here we are years later…. We are going about our lives. We open up Facebook and BOOM! All of the political opinions!

Here I thought we had so much in common, but wow, we really do not. It’s like a blow somehow. I feel deceived and duped after all this time. I thought I knew this person but I don’t.

What’s with all of these political rants? Can’t Facebook just be fun and lighthearted?

While I’m trying really hard to try to move on, It. Is. Really. Difficult.

It’s hard to not know what you now know about some people’s views.

I am really doing my best to not Like or Comment on anyone’s political anything, whether I agree with them or not. But gosh, it’s hard!

Staying off Facebook

Many people opt to stay off Facebook during heated political times. This is a great way to just cocoon away and not deal with any of it.

We highly recommend this option. Taking a break from Facebook has many advantages, especially in politically-charged climates when it brings you down instead of bringing you joy.

Support America by being positive

I’m hoping for so many positive changes. I don’t need to be right in my political opinions. This is much bigger than me and what I think, believe, and feel.

No matter what we really believe, it is important to support our teachers, our coach, our boss, our political leaders.

United we stand and divided we fall. Yes, it’s a cliche and an old junior high cheer, but it’s true decades and generations later.

Sadly, especially these days, I use the Unfollow option often as I try to hide people’s political opinions.

Doing good things because of what’s going on

I do admire the people who are so upset with our current political climate that they are doing good things.

They are doing things to make a difference intentionally.

So there is some good coming out of this.

When they post that on Facebook — without making a big political statement — that is something positive, and I view it that way.

Facebook and politics
Facebook and politics (Photo credit: Olin Gilbert)

Political rants on Facebook

Even though I’ve lived in many places, including some super-conservative and super-liberal areas, I’ve been shocked at things my Facebook friends are posting.

I’ve known many of my friends had very different views from each other.

However, somehow with this post-Inauguration Day posting, it seems almost worse than after Trump was elected. (Maybe everyone was in shock?)

I have one friend who posted 38 times with 38 political posts from Inauguration Day morning until the following Tuesday.

That’s 38 political posts in five days. Yes, I Unfollowed her!

I’m sure she posted more the sixth and seventh days, and longer. I never checked her page to find out.

Something I do to curb my time on Facebook is to check the first 10 posts in my Facebook News Feed. Then I go on to click and read all the Facebook notifications.

This helps me keep my time on Facebook short and sweet.

On Inauguration Day, nine of the first 10 posts in my Facebook News Feed were political posts… 90%!

(Aren’t you interested to know what the other one was about? The one and only post that wasn’t political was about someone getting a flat tire.)

Inauguration Day and Women’s Marches on Facebook

The day of the Women’s Marches, I checked the first 10 Facebook posts in my Newsfeed again.

Three posts — ranking higher because of all the likes and comments — were my Facebook friends posting about being at the Women’s March closest to them.

The fourth post was a Facebook friend’s post how she was in Washington, DC for the march.

Another three posts were political.

That left three posts which were about random things:

  • Someone’s dinner at a restaurant
  • Another asking to say a prayer for someone who was injured ice skating (head trauma)
  • A friend’s new puppies. (Yay! Don’t spoiled, precious puppies make everything better?!)

Sure, I’ve unfriended and unfollowed people before, but this time, it seems to be a lot different.

People can’t seem to keep their opinions to themselves.

And the thing about this election/outcome is that people have very strong opinions.

No one is going to be swayed to the other side after reading a post. So why bother posting anything at all?

Sunday after Inauguration Day on Facebook

The Sunday after Inauguration Day, it was really heating up.

People must have had a lot of extra time, not being a traditional work day.

Many missed the Inauguration Day television viewing and must have gone to their politically-biased “news source” of choice and spent their time righteously commenting about all things politics.

That was a tough day to be on Facebook if you didn’t want to be a part of these conversations.

The first 8/10 posts showing up in my Facebook Newsfeed that Sunday were political, including those that were related to the Women’s March.

The other two posts?

One friend saying “Goodbye for the next four years,” alerting everyone she was taking a break from Facebook.

While not political in nature, it was fallout from all of the political postings.

The other non-political post was a Facebook friend wishing her son a Happy Birthday.

Monday after Inauguration Day on Facebook

The Monday after Inauguration Day?

I was still reeling from everything I read on Sunday so I stayed off Facebook all day…. that’s no small achievement either!

But at least I didn’t get aggravated from everyone’s Facebook posts, and I accomplished a lot being offline.

Tuesday night after Inauguration Day on Facebook

At long last, that Tuesday, my Facebook Newsfeed displayed “just” 3/10 political posts!

Hurray! Was it finally ending?

(My friend who posted her political opinions 38 times in five days? I’m sure she’s still posting away. I haven’t taken the time to go to her page to find out.)

Why are so many people posting their political opinions on Facebook?

What happened to fun in Facebookland? What happened to cute pictures of pets and braggy pictures of your children’s accomplishments?

I long to see someone showing off their fabulous vacation.

I now find myself hunting down certain people who I can count on to post perfect pictures of their perfect kids in perfect outfits.

Where are the lighthearted, attention-seeking cliffhanger posts? Let’s celebrate a Facebook birthday.

These are the posts I now crave.

Please, Facebook friends, post these now so that I don’t have to be annoyed at the political posts so many want to keep writing.

I’m especially stunned at people with professional jobs, in the public especially, posting their opinions. Facebook and politics do not mix.

Didn’t we all learn as we entered our twenties and started having adult conversations to avoid all discussions pertaining to money/finances, religion, and politics?

How didn’t others learn this too? Why is it okay to blast these hot topics out on Facebook?

February after Inauguration Day on Facebook

A month after the inauguration, I had a Facebook friend post he was going to deactivate his Facebook account because he was so disgusted at all the political posts.

He said Facebook is supposed to be fun, a community to support each other, not for political statements and arguments.

He didn’t want to now think bad things about these people who are quoting from biased “news” sources who disagree what he believes.

I’m sure he misses the ease of being in touch with so many people so effortlessly but he was fed up.

Showing a united front on Facebook

Whenever I read a political post, all I can think of is how sad that our United States isn’t united.

All the world knows it too. I flashback to a junior high volleyball game. I remember our coach being very upset because we weren’t being a team. We were down on each other.

She emphasized how we needed to display a united front in front of our opponents, our competitors.

This holds true today in my kids’ sports. Coaches and parents teach them to be a team, to build each other up, and to support each other.

No matter what, kids learn to display a united front and solidarity in front of their opponents.

Yet we as adults… on Facebook… in the newspapers… online… on the radio… everywhere… we are not showing our solidarity to other nations.

Even worse, there are many wishing our current political leaders to fail.

Whether you like President Trump or despise him, hoping he fails is the equivalent of cutting off your nose to spite your face.

If he fails, that hurts America. It hurts all of us. Do you really need to be that right? I sure don’t.

NFL players and the National Anthem

Then political dissent reached NFL players. Keep America united in the news!

These football players are role models, making millions of dollars a year.

Wouldn’t it be great if they were respectful “at work,” (at their games), in front of their millions of fans… and they did something positive off the field?

Instead of jumping on the bandwagon at a game, they can make their statements off the field by donating, volunteering, or doing something to make their point.

Social Fixer app

There is an option other than Unfriending in order to filter out political statements on Facebook. It requires downloading the Social Fixer for Facebook app.

This is actually a way to filter out political posts on Facebook.

Check out this option if you don’t want to Unfollow someone. This app enables you to filter out offending posts.

Facebook and politics don’t mix

We all love Facebook. We want to continue loving Facebook. Can’t we just keep Facebook positive?

I implore you all, please stop posting your political views on Facebook. Politics and Facebook are a bad combination.

Set up an invite-only Facebook group for politically like-minded Facebook friends if you must.

Then you can all agree with how correct you are. The rest of us don’t want to read it.

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